Encouragement from a Presybtera Who Is a Mother of a Child with a Disability

Toward the End of Summer 2023 . . .

Blessings of the Lord to you!
Summer is winding down, and what a summer it has been for our family – full of adventure. Not
the kind of adventure we had planned, however.
A month ago, a health issue which my body was likely dealing with for a long time, came to a
head. After a couple frightening misdiagnoses, I was finally admitted to the hospital to treat a
blood infection and have surgery on my leg.
Thank God, I am home and recovering mobility and strength of body, mind, and soul, a little
more every day. I am returning to myself, and even more to my real self than I was prior to this
trial.
As my son’s main caregiver, so much of the fear and emotional distress I experienced during
my hospital stay was intricately intertwined with his and my family’s well-being in my absence. In
addition to my matriarchal anxieties, I was blessed to briefly experience helplessness,
vulnerability, bodily malaise, persistent pain from the infection, and all the medically necessary
but hurtful poking, procedures, and testing I had to endure to receive healing.
My struggles, however, could not match my son’s level of intense helplessness, vulnerability,
malaise, and agony he endured as a premature infant with multiple organ systems in need of
repair nearly 20 years ago. His first taste of life was such an afflicted beginning lasting 5 months
in the NICU, and continuing with subsequent surgeries and illnesses during his formative years.
I realized during my time in the hospital, that as he was merely an infant with no prior foundation
of love and security from which to gather strength and peace, that it was a blessing – a covering
– when his neurology emerged atypically. I believe the Lord wanted me to see this: that his
being Autistic has been a gift for him often protecting his body and soul in mysterious ways.
I wept many tears of compassion and recognition for Michael while I was in the hospital this
summer. I always knew he suffered, and though my mind understood that his survival was a gift,
it was not until last month that I realized with all my heart what a miracle of God he is as a
human being. He is among the strongest and bravest people I know.
Yes, I can now say that this recent health trial was a blessing.
No, I did not count it as such a few weeks ago.
I share this very personal experience with you all, because I trust that you who have disabilities
or care for those with disabilities or seek to minister to those with disabilities, will understand to
some degree; and that hopefully you will benefit from some of the many lessons I learned
through my recent illness:

Caregivers, you must care for yourself. If you do not, you will not be in any condition to care for
the people you love. You must seek help and graciously receive it. Your body will eventually
slow you down if you continue to push through your struggles alone.
Caregivers, others will step up and care for your loved ones when you cannot. Teach them as
best you can and then let them provide care as best they can, in their own uniquely-gifted way.
God really knows what He is doing, for all of us. I do not mean to say God causes our suffering.
However, what He allows us to endure, He can make beautiful. For “we know that all things
work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His
purpose.” (Rom 8:28) For too long I lamented what I perceived as a lack of relationship with my
son because of his being nonverbal and his difficulty connecting with others in typical ways. I
see more clearly with the passing years that we have a love that goes deeper than words and
expresses itself mysteriously, uniquely, and authentically.
If you have a voice, use it. I learned I have a voice and it is not only to use on behalf of my son
and others who cannot speak for themselves. Self-advocacy is not selfish. We must honestly
express our hurts, needs, viewpoints and concerns to our doctors, priests, family members, etc.,
if we want to be understood and helped.
Everything we count as “little” or do not remember to be grateful for, is a gift. When one is sick
and weak, the gift of medicines to bring relief, of heathy food to nourish, of a friend to visit, are
like precious gems of love falling from heaven. We appreciate all of life so much more when we
realize how fragile it really is – how fragile we really are.
There are many more lessons and blessings blossoming in our family because of our summer
adventure. A new normal is being fashioned in our daily lives for which I am so grateful.
It is the joy of resurrection – of a new and better life – which makes the pains of our past worth
enduring. Every cross we carry with Christ’s help and the love of others, ushers in greater
degrees of strength, faith, and wholeness.
May we all know this transformative growth, meeting our personal “adventures” in the Way
Christ laid out for us and continues to endure with us. It is the only Way to heal.
With Gratitude to Our Lord, ______.

Friendship Circle: 20 Things Every Parent of a Child with Special Needs Can Be Thankful For

Giving thanks isn’t for just the holiday of Thanksgiving.  Terri Mauro injects some humor into the challenging lives of special needs parents: 

To access:

20 Things Every Parent of a Child with Special Needs Can Be Thankful For

Think about it, though; giving thanks in these 20 situations is a great illustration of these words of St. Paul the Apostle:

¹⁶ Rejoice always, 

¹⁷ pray without ceasing, 

¹⁸ in everything give thanks;

for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Scripture taken from the New King James Version® (NKJV) 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18; Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Access the video by clicking on the You Tube title into a new tab

 

 

Mental Health & Orthodox Christianity – Episode 6: Understanding Suicide

Access the video by clicking on the You Tube title into a new tab

Mental Health & Orthodox Christianity – Episode 5: Sadness & Depression

Access the video by clicking on the You Tube title into a new tab

Mental Health & Orthodox Christianity – Episode 4: Worry, Anxiety, & Fear

Episode 3 is not available on You Tube; so let us proceed to Episode 4:

Access the video by clicking on the You Tube title into a new tab